Friday, May 18, 2012

Always Learning

Here are the top ten things I learned by going to Detroit Tigers Game yesterday. Here we go.

  1. When passing the sunblock to your kids, remember to hit your own forehead with a little SPF 30. Oh, and your nose too.
  2. Arrive early for batting practice so you can catch your favorite Tiger warming up.
  3. Tell middle child that chili cheese fries will include faux cheese. "I didn't know it would come with fake cheese, mom." This isn't some tricky advertising babe; cheese is in it's name.
  4. Go get all of the snacks yourself or your new teenager will miss two home runs while getting Dippin' Dots and complain about it. For way.too.long.
  5. Have everyone use the bathroom before leaving the park because you will get stuck in the parking garage & traffic and now you've got a problem on your hands.
  6. There is a reason Eminem turned out the way he did. Have you seen 8 Mile Road? 'Cause we did on an emergency bathroom stop for one of our kids and let me tell you, there were bullet proof glass windows at every gas station and restaurant. Oh, and no public restrooms thank you very much.
  7. Take the grandparents with you. They have infinitely more patience for your kids than you do. Well, until one of the kids farts in the back of the mini-van.
  8. Consult the hubby about what beverage he is getting at the other food station before you stand in line at another one. Otherwise you will end up with two giant souvenir cups of Mountain Dew. Or what my kids like to call, "Mountain Burp".
  9. Play Family Feud (app on the iPod Touch) with well, your family. It's a hoot to hear the answers that they think will be on the board.
  10. Remind the guys behind you that even though they are enginerds (engineer nerds) they can still cheer and talk to one another at the game. Quietest bunch of men I've ever encountered and when I told them that they said, "well, we're not really baseball fans." Alrighty then. Welcome to Comerica Park!


the deKorne family said...

Hilarious. Except the 8 mile part..that's scary. I guess when you gotta go you gotta go. :)

Melissa said...

Nice Post... Thanks!

Anonymous said...

There is so much potential for fun with this situation. My dad was like Air Max Cheap for years. He stood in the Walmart electronics aisle, blocking the little electric eye that would beep whenever someone entered or exited it, completely unable to hear it going BEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ... finally, one of the salesmen asked him to move.

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